Mobile phones have opened new frontier

(Aug. 22)—I would say the discovery of electricity changed the world probably more than any one thing. But in the last two decades I would say mobile phones have changed the world again more than anything.

If you would have told me 20 years ago you would have almost every ole cowboy even out on horseback with a cellphone in his hand or pocket—I would have thought you were nuts. I would have said, "No way!" Nowadays a kid doesn't even have to learn how to spell as long; as he can even get it close enough spell check will spell it for him. And now no one has to figure in his head—just use a computer or phone.

But even with technology—you still have some who can barely use a phone—no text or email. Then you have some like myself who use and send texts but little more. And then you have those smart alecks who can make their phone do anything. I have a smartphone but I wish they would have called it a dumb phone because it's not quite so bad if you say I can't get this dumb phone to work but when you have to say I can't get this smartphone to work, it makes you feel dumb.

One cattle customer came to the sale last week. He has a phone but does not text—let alone anything else. He said to the lady managing the restaurant, "I brought my wife down Sunday for dinner but you weren't open." She said, "I'm sorry; we tried to get the word out. I put it on Facebook." Quickly, he repeated the words "face" and "book" dragging out those words like, are you kidding me?!

All the rest of the cowboys at the table started laughing. In fact, I was still laughing the next day. A few minutes later someone said something about some cattle and we said to him—you probably should have looked on Facebook. Sometime we have to make our own humor.

I have been so depressed as I got kicked out of ballet class for pulling a groin and it wasn't even my groin.

At the coffee shop I learned that Taylor Swift had sued a guy for only $1 for putting his hand somewhere that he shouldn't have. Quickly several cowboys spoke up and said—"I would gladly give a dollar to do that."

The 2015 statistics for full body screening at airports showed terrorists discovered—0, transvestites discovered—133. The number of hernias discovered was 1,485. There were 3,172 hemorrhoid cases and 8,249 enlarged prostates. Also, there were 59,350 breast implants and only three natural blondes.

Editor's note: Jerry Nine, Woodward, Oklahoma, is a lifetime cattleman who grew up on his family's ranch near Slapout, Oklahoma.

Source: Mobile phones have opened new frontier