The Reuters report said that BlackBerry will not only adopt Android but put it in a "Qwerty slider" smartphone.
Ha ha ha ha.
"The slider will combine a touch screen with a physical keyboard that users can use if they prefer," Reuters quips.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Oh, God.
BlackBerry didn't offer much comment on the report beyond the usual 'we ain't saying nothing' nonsense, so I am going to take this opportunity to plead with the company: Don't do it. Please, for the love of God, just don't.
I'm not asking for selfish reasons, and I'm actually in a pretty good mood given that I started the day with a Snoop Dogg story. Such a move on BlackBerry's part would make very little difference to me and my life beyond having to review a smartphone that I'd be too ashamed to use on public transport.
Reuters' sources said that "by making an Android device that boasts a large touchscreen and a physical keyboard, BlackBerry hopes to snag a niche in the touchscreen-dominated Android market".
Listen up, BlackBerry. The Android market, along with the smartphone market as a whole in fact, is dominated by touchscreens for a reason. Nobody wants a physical keyboard attached to their smartphone anymore (OK, I know there's some people out there but, really, c'mon).
Let's look at some numbers. Here in the UK, BlackBerry clings on to 0.7 percent of the smartphone market, and the figure drops to 0.6 percent in the US. 0.6 percent!
In comparison, Google's Android and Apple's iOS account respectively for 54.2 percent and 35.8 percent of smartphone sales here in Blighty, despite neither firm offering the choice of a device with a Qwerty keyboard attached.
If there really was a demand for physical keyboards, surely BlackBerry's share of the market would be higher. There's the BlackBerry Passport (lol) and newly released BlackBerry Classic out there and, with other manufacturers having largely ditched physical buttons for good, there's not really much other choice.
Of course, some might argue that talk of an Android-powered device with a physical keyboard might pique the interest of those who have currently decided against a keyboard-toting device given the lack of choice available on the market.
But, BlackBerry, do you really think there are enough of these people out there to turn your fortunes around?
Some will also claim that there's still space for the Qwerty keyboard in the business market, in particular one running Google's Android software given its new security credentials, but let's be honest: there isn't.
I will again turn to numbers to back up my point here. In the first quarter of this year, the iPhone accounted for 72 percent of enterprise smartphone activations, as businesses turned their affections to the iPhone 6 and iPhone 6 Plus.
Android claimed a further 26 percent of activations (Good Technology noted that companies are proving quite fond of the Galaxy S5) and Windows Phone - bless it - claimed one percent.
Good Technology doesn't include BlackBerry activation figures in its report, but my calculator tells me that Apple, Android and Windows Phone combined make up 99 percent of enterprise smartphone activations leaving just one percent, or less, to BlackBerry.
Don't just listen to me, listen to Jim Balsillie. The former BlackBerry CEO admitted this week that following the release of the iPhone back in 2007, "he knew" the firm no longer stood a chance of competing in the smartphone market. This was amplified further as Google's Android began to make a name for itself.
"That was the time I knew we couldn't compete on high-end hardware," Balsillie was quoted as saying.
After all, Balsillie was right about BBM. Years before BlackBerry finally opened its messaging platform to iOS and Android - and failed to make a dent given the popularity of the likes of WhatsApp and Facebook Messenger - he had pleaded with the firm to release BBM on competing platforms.
Then again, Balsillie also admitted that he's one of the few out there still clinging onto a BlackBerry Bold, so maybe he will buy an Android-powered Qwerty slider.
Ha ha ha ha. µ
Source: BlackBerry, please don't release an Android smartphone
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